man. So much stuff not going on. I’ll start with work. Work is crazy. Man … meetings all the time, strategies, client lunches, client dinners, making plans, prepping for certain things. I’m already tired of all the squabbling that is going on as everyone henpecks for position in the new power ladder. I mean, sure, it’s fun to try and secure a place and make sure that all my bases are covered, but I’m really, really getting worn out with all the power plays. I’d much rather get the work done and then go about getting more work to do. I am suddenly dissatisfied, again, with the financial situation. I’m fucking broke, and it sucks. Why am I broke? Not due to mismanaging the finances, but to the serious lack of inflowing cash. Work is great. I won’t quit my job because it’d be damn near impossible to get another one. I guess I’ll just shut my trap and hunker down. On the personal side of things. Nothing is going on. I haven’t seen anyone, including the roommates. My general irritation of theweberhouse is evident to me, if not everyone else. The weekend has been really, really low key. The highlight? I filled my waterbed to the brim, so it’s nice and firm … and I did 6 loads of laundry. I have lots of clean clothes, and a nice, warm, comfy bed. And a PS2. Those are the things I have to look forward to every day. Isn’t that just sad? Sheesh … I’ve really slid. In every way. I’m very reticent, I’m always tired, I just want to relax when I get home … but then I get down, because hanging out at the house gets old really, really quick when there is nobody home. I read. I play on the PS2. I hang out online. I read some more. I do some work. But I never really *do* anything. it sucks. Been having some heavy duty internal thinking/issues too. Lots. Too many. It’s what invariably happens when I don’t have enough to do. I start thinking about things, my life, my job, my future. Where I’ve been, where I’m going. Always gets me down. I haven’t written in my journal in forever. lack of motivation. I think I’ll get a second job — not just for the very-handy money, but for the decrease in time I’ll have to get down on myself. [b]Update[/b] – got into a weak willed conversation with Laura today about Rudy Giuliani … thought I’d post some good links regarding him and leadership in general. [L=http://www.nydailynews.com/news/story/22559p-21397c.html]http://www.nydailynews.com/news/story/22559p-21397c.html[/L] [L=http://www.openair.org/alerts/artist/nyhitl2.html]http://www.openair.org/alerts/artist/nyhitl2.html[/L] [L=http://www.leighthompson.com/media/psychology_of_leadership.htm]http://www.leighthompson.com/media/psychology_of_leadership.htm[/L] [b]Update 9/30/02[/b] @ 5:29pm – The new Lord of the Rings – The Twin Towers trailer is out (Quicktime format) Linkified to a rand0m.org download, below: [L=http://rand0m.org/temp/LotR-TTT.mov]http://rand0m.org/temp/LotR-TTT.mov[/L]
Today there was a press release in the Gazette talking about my company being bought by another company … yahoo links follow: [L=http://biz.yahoo.com/djus/020924/1050000468_1.html]USURF Amer Signs Letter To Buy High Plains Internet[/L] [L=http://biz.yahoo.com/prnews/020924/latu067_1.html]USURF America Signs Letter of Intent to Acquire High Plains Internet[/L] Maybe I’ll get a bigger paycheck. *crosses fingers* In other news, I woke up sick.That really, really pisses me off. I *HATE* being sick … it’s right up there with how much I hate wind. So, somebody got me sick, because I do not randomly get sick. I think it was either Melissa or Tony. I’m going to blame Tony, simply because he is an easy target. Tony, why did you get me sick? *sigh* I took like 500x my daily alotment of vitamin C in hopes of my sickness not developing into full-blown illness. At least he’s going to bring home some NyQuil. mmmmmm … *miserable feelings here* I think that when I finally get of my truck, or if I keep it, or whatever, I’ll get an early 90s Jeep Cherokee. Not one of the Grand Cherokees, nor the Cherokee Wagon, but the [L=http://rand0m.org/image.php?name=93cherokee&type=jpg]Cherokee Sport or Cherokee Country[/L]. I don’t know why, but I like them. Especially with 31″ tires and a mild suspension lift. Yummy. [b]Update[/b] – It’s 12:09pm, and it is the first time I have taken an afternoon off from a day I am supposed to work in like 8 months. The reason for me not attending to my oh-so-rigorous duties? I’m sick. All out sick, I mean: headache, blurry vision, fever, sore throat, hurting mouth, sore all over. I’m in bad shape, and I am at home. *sigh*
So Burnz is over here thursday night till like 5am, so I’m completely wasted all day Friday. blech, that sucked. And now it’s saturday, and I slept for a good 9 hours. Until Tony’s goddamn alarm went off. Fucker leaves town for the evening and leaves that shit on, so it starts ringing at like 7:30am. I was pretty pissed, cuz then I had to go and shut that shit off. *sigh* Funny link of the day: [L=http://www.mintyass.com]mintyass.com[/L] Funny Quote otDay: [i][b]Female Hormones in Beer[/b] – Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn’t drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.[/i] Hehehe. Also, heavy, heavy news at the house … never woulda thought. Oh well. UPDATE AT 2:52AM w0o … okay, so I’m over at Frank’s house, celebrating his 26th … I’m so trashed hahahhah, I’m sitting in James lap, typijng this shit up wondering “where th eufck is frank!?” he’s supposed to be here, but isntead, we’re hitting up the Fat Tire keg, wondering “when are we going to get laid!” hahahhaa rock the fucking hizouse. And no, I am not talking about james. I just happen to be right here newar the compute.r w0oow wee Okay, 4:02 am, and I am still fcukedc up … rock the fucking ohsue! frank rocks! Computer says 5:10am. My apologies if this wanders. I am very drunk and very out of it, and I have this to say: I walked home with no shoes on — I had them in my hand, but did not put them on. The rocks on the way home hurt. My truck and the keg will need to be pickedup tomorrow *NOTE SO SELF* … Also, note to self: do not party with Tony; he is out of control. Honestly: several questions of “who the fuck is that guy” … “a little too eager” … “goddamn man, you have a girlfriend, calm down” … again, out of control. Wants to fight, obviously, is very confronational, wants to get into a brawl. Hence, out of control tony … will try not to engage this sort of activity with him again. He is very, very drunk, and very very stupid and aggressive. here I am, way smashed out of my completely ready to just fall over infornt o the tcomputer, and all I can think is “no shoes, ow” .. “carrie” … “out of *control; do not repeat” … worst high-session yet. reason: tony is out of control. 5:22am – receive call from disco that tony is out of control, and will not come home. screaminga nd yelling by otny on the phone. going to go retreive tony. thank you james. 5:40am — just got back in. Met James at PHS aux pariking lot, with a screaming, violent tony. Walked up, began to help james carry tony home. Tony punches me in the face, I deck him, straight up, then kick him in the stomach. Tony settles down a bit, james manhandles him to weberstreet. Tony gets violent, I punch him again and push him to the ground. He gets up, we stagger him home to the front room couch. He seems to be already asleep, in less than 3 minutes. I post, trying to keep some sort of history for my posterity and my own future edification.I hope this never, ever happens again. 5:52am – thank you james. [b]Update[/b] – 11:30am – Awake now, after not enough sleep, because for the second day in a row Tony’s GODDAMN ALARM IS STILL ON. GaAaaAAAaaaaAaAaah. Right, so not enough sleep, and I wake up to people and the alarm. Apparently we got home after everybody else got back from Ft.Collins (4am?) … my apologies if we woke you up! sOo, I survived, sans a truck and a keg — which are at Frank’s house. I am very hungover this morning, though … almost feels like I’m still drunk, except that I have a splitting headache. Even though things got fucked up, I still had a great time last night … Going to Hooters for lunch with Paulie in a bit. w3rd.
I never considered it before, but recently, it seems like the most stimulating intellectual conversations come at times later than 2am. Maybe it’s that Burnz and I are in the same boat in a lot of ways, or that we’re just bitter people sharing camaraderie, but I cannot help finding myself thoroughly enjoying early AM discussions. Good times; hard on the sleep cycle. Couple of personal revelations made during the last few days, mostly regarding my views on the world and just how fucked up and insecure I really am … sadly, I’d bet that with only a small bit of coaxing, the wildly perceptive audience here would be able to psychoanalyze me to a T. Ha! Okay, how I got to the point where I would write that sentence, I do not know. I think it has to do with the fact that I’m a control-mongering, woman-dominating dickhead who is wildly spiteful about the many opportunities, and consequently the untold wasted ones, that others are afforded that I am not. Grrr. In other news, Wendy’s Nuggets are the shit. I went and got 6 packs of these things, and got 2 more free packs of nuggets, a free BlockBuster rental, a free frost, a free upsize and a free 20oz soda. NUGZ, WOOO!
But this weekend was crazy. Friday night, I have no idea what happened. I think I worked late, and then … I went home? I don’t know :-/ … moving on … Saturday! Saturday was good. Wait, I think I got drunk on Friday. I wish I knew. Hmmm … Okay, so Saturday. I didn’t do much this day either, except decide that I was going to buy a DVD player because Housematt’s Samsung … well, it’s mostly just because I don’t have one of my own. So we go to Best Buy to buy a DVD player, and then 3 hours later, we come home in Paulie’s Jeep with a Playstation 2 and a bunch of extra niceties. w0ot w0ot! The GTA3 action started shortly, followed up by some play on Burnz’ “Twisted Metal Black,” which is a shweet car-blowing-up-and-chasing-with-missiles-and-guns game. It was mucho fun. Then Saturday night rolled around. It was a very long night, but one that I’m glad that I partook of. It’s all about the follow through … thanks matt And then it was Sunday. Went over to Waffle House aka southern-trucker-in-a-can at like 2pm and ate breakfast. yummmy. Then … I don’t know. All I know is that I was very tired. But yea, Sunday was good. I think. Not too sure on that one. And then came Monday. It was a normal day, just like any other, except that I went to Best Buy and bought NHL 2002. That is probably one of the most gratifying things I have done recently. No, it was the playing of NHL 2002 that made things great. From 9pm until 6am, that game ruled my life. I am venturing to say that it is the best PS/2 game I have played to date … it has replay value out the roof, varying levels of everything, adjustable everything, does dolby digital dts, it is amazing. I am tired from very little sleep, but it is the shit.
I had a broken watch. Yep, my $120 hunk of metal made by Kenneth Cole had a dead battery. Had one for a good 3 days, too, throwing off my timing, making me go screeching around the house like I was 3 hours late, made me miss a meeting, you know, all that stuff that happens when you have no idea what time it is. Well, I showed that little bugger today. Went out and got a battery at Wal-Mart. They asked how much the watch cost … I replied honestly, and they said they could not put the battery in for me. Too expensive for them to cover if they break it. Grrr. Got to work, after eating a yummy $.99 McDonalds sausage something or other, and put in the new battery. And that’s when the wrastlin started. See, watches have these things called “battery covers”. It’s the plate on the back, and it’s made of metal. And woowee is it a feisty little creature. After a heinous amount of blood, sweat, aching muscles and sobbing, the 4 minute battle was over, and I lost. I finally broke down and had to take her down. Down to the jewelry shop, that is! HAHAHA, TEH MASTAR TRYUMFS! So that was my highlight of the morning. I’m waiting for something equally spiffy to happen later today. [b][u]Update[/u][/b] – quote of the day: [b][i]realbighead:[/i][/b] your massive nose prevents you from ever having arbitrary declaration power. [b][u]Update #2[/u][/b] – I went out with Christina and got some sukashay at Ichiban’s. mMmMmmmm, so good. We had a good time
I decided to do it. I wiped out my archived mail. No more old, saved messages from Janelle to hurt over, no old, pain-filled correspondence saved, nothing. I saved some work e-mail … that’s it. I’m sad, because it’s gone. I’m happy, because it’s gone. You know, it’s all about the small things. [b]Update[/b] – I’m updating all my contacts, so if everybody would please send me their phone # and e-mail addies (e-mail to email@example.com or AIM: rand0m), I’d be much appreciative. Thanks. [b]Update #2[/b] – September 11th, 2002 … 1 year anniversary of a sad day. I know that I will take a few minutes in the morning to mourn the tremendous loss of life. [b]Update #3[/b] – 3:38p … Everyone at HPI went over to the aptly named Memorial Park and enjoyed the services there. They had local big-band music playing mostly patriotic songs, free hamburgers and hotdogs, and a handful of public dignitaries speaking. It was good
It rained last night. I’m laying there in bed, getting ready to sleep, and I hear the soft pangs as rain hits the trashcan outside, the quiet patter as it bounces off the roof. Ahhhh, amazing rain. I love rain … it makes my day so nice when there is a slight drizzle … when it’s just overcast enough to make your eyes not hurt. mmmmmm, rain. The Internet Explorer 6 SP1 Administration Kit is a bitch. There are almost a bazillion options, and very few of them work exactly how one would expect. I spent just over 2 hours fucking around with it to try and get it to make a set of files we can have printed on CDs to distribute … and nothing. Talk about wasting my otherwise-useless-time. I think that I will wipe the HP box James dropped off and put in the 40gb hd and install Redhat 7.3 on a separate partition. Mmmmmm, yummy linux. Did I mention that the IEAK6 sucks ass? It does. In other news, I hear that houseshawn is getting a different car? Maybe? Also, my watch battery died. After more than 2 years, it gave up the mortal coil and went off into the land of the free electrons. Little bitch made me late. More stuff as it comes?
I went to the YMCA and found out that it’s $26/mo for a membership, with a $51 startup fee. Goddamn, that’s a lot of bucks just to swim. Unfortunately I can’t think of any other place in town that has an indoor pool for public use. I don’t want to shell out that much cash, though. Any other ideas? Man, I have’t done jack shit all day. I have sat here in my office chair, trying to think up things to do. I verified the backups, I made a couple images, I made the rounds with all the people here. I don’t have anything to do. Hmmm. Suggestions? I watched Requiem for a Dream last night. Man, what a trippy movie. Literally. Ha! Seriously, though, that’s a great movie. And the Pi Guy is in it! That chick is a freaking babe, and the raunchy acts that she partici… yea, and that dude got his arm cut off! Ugh. Anyway, good movie — don’t know if I want to watch it again, though; it made my head hurt sometimes, and gave me a general feeling of uneasiness. [b][u]Update[/u][/b] – 3:56pm – It’s been pouring downtown all day. I’m really stoked that we have rain, but I am not so stoked that I get to walk home. Hmmmmm. Does anybody know of a free, not-crappy alternative for Microsoft Exchange? We’re looking for some collaborate-ware, and we’re perfectly cool with ditching Outlook/Express if it involves not spending thousands on MS Exchange. Thnx!
This weekend has been rough on the liver. Both Friday and Saturday night involved heavy drinking and me getting completely blasted. It was fun. Thanks to Frank for letting people party at his place all the time. I have a general feeling of being under the weather. I don’t know exactly what’s causing it … it might be job stress, personal tension, too much liquor, not enough hang-out-with-people-time, but it’s starting to irritate me. I’m usually rather happy and outgoing, but Thurs, Fri, Sat came out as just being rather quiet and not really wanting to do anything. I didn’t go get my YMCA pass, though … might go do that and do some swimming today. Digweed is some amazing techno. Throw in Sasha, and the combonation becomes just incredible. Typing this post to a nice long set of the duo, and it’s really, really good. Set of pics of a hot chick (mostly non-nude), large download: [L=http://rand0m.org/images/bimmer]http://rand0m.org/images/bimmer[/L] [b]Update[/b] – 3:11p – I see that Tore doesn’t have his DSL up yet. And I am sad because he has no broadband. *sniffle* I also feel like I need to do some web work. I don’t know what, but I should. hmmmmmm