You wanted to see it, here it is – Defcon 13, 2005

Make sure to check out [L=http://rand0m.org/gallery.php?gid=19]my pics[/L] as well as the official [L=http://www.defconpics.org]DefconPics Site[/L]. Do keep in mind that not many people like having their photo taken at Defcon, and carrying a camera while partying sucks. OK so we decide that we’re going to defcon the week before it actually happens. I call up Jack and make sure it’s cool that Keen and I crash with him. 5×5. So we’re going to leave Thursday night. OK so Thursday night comes and we start on our way to Las Vegas for defcon13. We’re cruising, it’s good. Pull into a gas station in Silverthorne to fuel up, see this ducati strapped to the back of a truck. Take some photos, chat with the guys. Leave silverthorne, then proceed to bust ass to Grand Junction. I was haulin … keen was asleep, so I was doing 90-100mph most of the way through the mountains. Hella good time. Pull into Grand Junction, get some gas, and right before we leave … boom, Ford explorer with the ducati rolls in. We talk to the guys in the explorer with a duck for a minute, turns out one of ’em is going to defcon. Wicked. Chat it up, then decide to bust ass to Vegas. Stop in the middle of nowhere to look at the stars, which was fun. By the way, when you hit Arizona in the morning, you can feel the temperature jump 40 degrees as the sun comes up. Other than that, relatively uninteresting, minus the insta-gambling as soon as you hit Nevada and the purple mountains / skyline. Very pretty. OK so we roll into vegas at 8:30am after ~12 hours of driving. Turns out that thanks to MDT vs PDT, it’s actually 7:30am. Shit. Head to the Luxor, eat some breakfast, then call up Jack (8:30am). Turns out Jack is hungover like a bitch, and is at Caesar’s, not Luxor. WTF? So we kill some time walking the strip (note: Caesar’s `Forums` are HUGE. Bigger than a mall) until Jack can check out of Caesar’s then check in at the Lux. Cool. Chill for a while more, hit the room and I pass out for an hour or so. Eventually we meet up with Keen’s friend Melissa, who is supah-hot, very smart and very friendly. Ate at Gordan Beirsch with her, then were like PEACE OUT as we were going to Defcon to get our drink on and our party on. Head over to Defcon, roll up with the badges and everything. Not too much is going on, but it’s early yet. Catch a conference on the win32 network stack and infiltration of the winsock api/sdi. Good talk. Anyways, we catch up with Keen’s buddy warlord, his g/f heather, and Patty, a chick keen also knows. Head over to Warlord’s place, then shit starts warming up. So we all start milling around the pools and the hotels, talking to random folks about random things, blah blah blah. We lose track of Patty somewhere, and I have to pee, so we go inside. As I head out of the bano, I run into [L=http://www.oreillynet.com/cs/catalog/view/au/1374]Brian[/L]. We chat for a minute, turns out that he writes the rules for [L=http://www.snort.org]Snort[/L], an intrustion detection system package that I use every day. We only find that out as the conversation is finishing up. WOw, speaking with high profile peeps is cool. Anyways, head out and Patty reappears in no time with Bruce, the founder of [L=http://www.shmoo.com/]The Shmoo Group[/L]. Turns out that Brian is also part of TSG, so we hit it off great. Bruce decides to show us a good time, and takes us to the Party. The [L=http://www.hackerpimps.com]hackerpimps[/L] party is nuts. We get carded, get our arm bands, and all hell breaks loose. I got to talking to sysman (sysmin?) about it, and it turns out that they had a stripper, but she was there for like 45 minutes then left (with a defcon $$$ attendee?). Shit. I look up, and POW another stripper, only this stripper is a girl I’d seen around before, Kirsten. So I go up to the bar and the drinks are free! Fuck yea! So I start hammering down, and Keen and Patty go outside to burn one, and I decide I’m going to check out the stripper. Who is really hot. I mean, really hot. WOw. Well, like 5 hours later, I’m totally hammered and having a helluva time. I am SO drunk, though, that I can barely see. I get ready to head outside, and there is Keen! Hey Keen! Where the hell have you and Patty been!? πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜‰ So we go outside, and I’m hanging over the edge of the balcony, trying not to puke. Randomly start talking to this dude named Beetle and his buddy Wes. Beetle works for Mitre alongside my pal, so we talk and talk and it’s a good time. Around 3:30am – a total guess – I’m so fucking plowed that I can barely stand. I remember getting into the cab, but that’s it. Next morning, wake up at 9:30am cuz Jack is making noise. I’m still freakin ripped. Trashed. I head to the bathroom, throw up and feel much better. Cut to 1pm. Wake up, v2.0. Everybody decides to get some grub, so we head down to the Luxor Buffet, eat, then head over to Defcon. Catch a couple good talks, especially the [L=http://www.asterisk.org]Asterisk[/L] info, mill around, meet some folks. I feel like hell. Run into warlord & heather again, head over to their room, start drinking. I start and finish with a vodka+mt.dew. I taste it and feel like throwing up. My body just wasn’t ready to continue ingesting alcohol, so it took almost 2 hours for me to down one drink. Went to hacker jeapordy, the black and white ball, saw a handful of talks, was a decent Saturday. We lost track of Keen again, as he was out partying/sexing/having a good time, but Jack and I decided to head out around midnight. Keen gave me shit about not partying, yada yada, but the thought of drinking again made me hurt. So we went home. At 7am, the hotel door opens up and whoa, there’s Keen. Just coming home. He says that he had the best fucking hamburger ever, and then proceeds to black out. Jack wakes up a little later and gets his shit ready to go to head back to the springs (he left Sunday, we stayed till Monday). We get the accomodations all worked out, and he departs. I head back to the room, hang out, go eat, hang out, do not much until ~12:30pm, then head off to Defcon. I caught a couple good talks, including one on Russian internetworking, another on Documenting Hackerdom, one on linguistic programming, and a few other misc shows. Defcon started to wind down, so I caught the awards ceremony, which was a good time. I called up Keen right around 6:30pm, as we were supposed to be having dinner with Melissa? I woke his hungoverpartyingass up, scheduled to meet with Melissa, and headed back to the hotel. Kene, Melissa and I went out to Marrakesh, a Matam Fez style Moroccan place, complete with finger food and a very talented belly dancer. Props to the pro butt shaking. Melissa had some other shiz planned, so we all headed out around 9pm or so. Keen and I decided we’d make a night of it and hit the strip, but only after a short nap. We walked around for a while, hitup all the major casinos – which, btw, are really luxury resorts with every thing you could ever want. Ended up at some hole in the wall with $2 craps. Keen said this is the place, so around 11:30pm, we started playing. I mean, he started playing, and I watched, because I had no idea how to play craps. Time went on and I caught on pretty well during Keen’s first $20. So I put in $20 and he put in $20, and we were both broke within an hour :-( … so I put in another $20 ($40 from each of us) and proceeded to play until almost 3:30am. Free drinks the whole time, of course. It got late, and we had to drive home, so Keen pulled me away from the table … I was at $33 when I left, so I lost a whopping $7 for 4 hours of entertainment + drinks. Good times. Then we came home. We somehow got home faster than we got out to Vegas, even though we drove during the day and it was hot as fuck the whole way – barring the torrential rains we got to enjoy in the moutains near Frisco, CO. All in all, it was a ridiculously good time. It felt good to just let loose and recharge my batteries in the city of sin.

2005-08-13 13:22:32 – ytcracker
thirty one thousand three hundred and thirty seven
2005-08-13 13:22:35 – ytcracker
thirty one thousand three hundred and thirty seven
2005-08-17 15:51:45 – jack
As the old ‘elite’ (arrrrghh to ###s and leettzzzzeee) What it was M’man. I’d CON with you guys anywhere….. BTW damn glad to see ya made it home Son! keep on, keepn’ on!
2005-08-23 19:50:41 – sooTi-
Haha, sounds like a blast. :)…Mayby I’ll hit up defcon sometime or another, if i get the nerve to go and have myself humiliated by people who know more than I do….lol
2005-08-27 16:42:48 – jrdn
31337

headed to defcon

It’s 6:30pm, and keen will be here in a few minutes to start our trip to Defcon 13! Check here for updates. [b]Update[/b] – Well we made it back to town safe and sound, with no arrests, no pullovers, no issues at all in over 1600 miles and 4 days of debauchery. I’ll follow up tomorrow sometime with all the photos and a documentary! [b]Update #2[/b] – I lied! I won’t be updating until Wednesday, because it’s 11:25pm on Tuesday and I’m damn tired.

2005-07-30 11:01:02 – WC
||33|) P1><!
2005-08-02 08:45:57 – WC
Quakecon in next week. You wanna go?
2005-08-02 08:46:09 – WC
in = is
2005-08-05 08:58:13 – GrooveMan
Web of Lies…
2005-08-05 10:18:09 – rand0m
I know, I know. I’m actually working on it -RIGHT NOW-
2005-08-05 16:41:09 – realbighead
I lied! I won’t be updating ever!
2005-08-07 18:26:20 – The Disco Nova
He is too busy searching for pics of a transvestite to update
2005-08-07 18:28:53 – rand0m
fuck yea, james drove me to it with his non-stop grabass.

Bday w/ Rents, network maintenance, Defcon, XMas Cruise

OK so here is another post. This week has been hit or miss, but some cool shit is on the horizon. I went to dinner with my ‘rents at the Iron Springs Chateau in Manitou Springs and had a helluva time. The food was pretty good (family style), but it wasn’t the main course; the vaudeville-esque show was absolutely incredible and extremely well done. It was followed up with an olio-style affair of skits, which was also a really good time. I thought it would be kind of lame, but the actors recognize that it’s corny as hell and go out of their way to make sure everybody is laughing it up. Thanks mom & dad! I had some network maintenance the other night. It was rough, and eventually had to execute a backout strategy. When you do maintenance, things never work -exactly- as planned, you have to adapt as things crop up. Unfortunately, when things are not going as planned in the 8+ page network maintenance packet, I get frustrated and lose the ability to crate insightful resolutions to newfound issues. Such was the case the other day. Eventually 1:50am came around and we had to pull out for fear of running through our window. After a restless 3 1/2 hours of sleep, it hit me that I made glaring oversights with regard to VLAN databases … made the whole thing not work. Couldn’t see it then, but saw it very clearly afterwards. Didn’t even have to google it, just knew what the issue was. D’oh. I’m sorry to let you guys down, but I’m not God :-/ Keen and I are going to [L=http://www.defcon.org]Defcon 2005[/L]. We decided this while we were out yesterday. We’re driving outta here on Thursday night, making it there Friday a little before noon. From there, wild partying will commence. We’ll be heading out on Monday morningish to make it back for work on Tuesday. Paulie, Keen and I decided we’re going on a cruise for xmas/new years. We’re looking at flying down to Florida on the 24th or 25th, hanging out with Paulie & Keen’s folks (they’re all in FL), going to Disney World, partying, then departing on the 29th or 30th for the Bahamas / West Caribbean. We’ll be partying hard and spending NYE2k6 on the water in the middle of the ocean. Fuck yea. I think we’ll be able to get some pro discounts if we can get more peeps to come, so lemme know if you’re 21+, interested in partying/drinking/sexing for a week and have about a thousand bucks. Fuck yea!

23rd Birthday Update

I know it’s been a while since I last posted, but a lot of neat stuff has been going on, and updating this ol’ piece of the interweb isn’t really high on my priority list. Speaking of priorities and lists, I love lists. I make a list and then feel really good as I go through and just wreck all the tasks. Yea. Yay for accomplishing things? Whoop, gotta pay the cell phone bill. brb. OK Done. Ok so cool things. I’ve played a lot of Battlefield 2. It’s an incredible game. Seriously, go buy it now and start playing. Don’t call me when you can’t get the needle out of your arm though … I can’t budge mine :-/ I turned 23 yesterday! Keen, Amanda and I met up with Steve-o, his brother and Danny at the Renaissance Festival and helluva time. I haven’t been in a couple years, and it was great to enjoy it again. I got sunburned like a motherfucker, though, and it still hurts. And the photos look terrible because of it. Regardless, that was really fun. We all took a break at home, then piled on up to Denver for a night on the town. We went for a nice dinner at The Wynkoop (where we met up with Craigalito and his g/f, Rachel), then headed over to SingSing, a piano bar. SingSing was ridiculously fun. I got hammered of course, but also had a super-great time. Many thanks to Keen, Steve, Craig, Shawn, Paulie, Rachel and Amanda for making my 23rd one to remember! Obligatory Pictures! [L=http://rand0m.org/gallery.php?gid=18]http://rand0m.org/gallery.php?gid=18[/L] I told Steve that I’d update with stuff more often, so I think I’ll do just that. I’ll try not to bore you guys with drivel, though, so it’s going to be tough to think of interesting & cool things to write about — but I’ll pull through! ‘night

2005-07-18 14:45:42 – The Disco Nova
http://www.netdisaster.com/go.php?mode=dog&url=http://rand0m.org
2005-07-18 16:58:40 – realbighead
hehe. nice camel toe.
2005-07-20 12:02:23 – rand0m
james you’re a douche.
2005-07-21 18:58:42 – GrooveMan
I close on my House tommorow @ 9:00am… Woot!

SuperWeekendUpdate

I shaved my head today, and got rid of the goatee. I think it looks decent, but James disagrees. I’ll ask some hot chicks what they think – maybe this whole “save $20 on a haircut” thing is crazy. Or not. Anyways, having a nice, even 1/8th inch of hair on the top of your head feels almost as good as getting a BJ after having just shaved your junk. Yea, that was too much. [L=http://www.eagames.com/official/battlefield/battlefield2/us/home.jsp]Battlefield 2[/L] came out on Friday, and it ate my weekend. Steve came down from Denver that night and we played until like 2am. Then he came over the next day, and played. All day. I went to sleep at 6am, but he and Keen kept at it until almost 8pm. That’s a lot of BF2 — and all on *one* map! It really is that good of a game. Good job, EA. New hotness things going on at work that are really fun. Hopefully things will ramp up to an insane pace and we’ll make shittons of cash, and I’ll retire at 23. Which, now that I think of it, is only 34 days away. And it’s on a Saturday. And I actually have free time. I anticipate much good-time-ness. Can’t believe I’m almost 23. WOw.

2005-06-13 17:03:04 – GrooveMan
BattleField 2 "Demo" Thanks again for letting me hang all weekend. Happy Pre-Birthday
2005-06-13 23:29:22 – Bondage..
omfg . . . did you really shave your head? I seriously JUST shaved me earlier tonight. . . wierd. . .
2005-06-13 23:37:38 – rand0m
Yea, Sunday night at like 10pm. It’s nice, ain’t it?
2005-06-14 03:05:43 – bondage
yeanm, i mn rbold and a litte bit drunkk , i but when my head hits the piollow tongiht its gonna be aweomse cause its co cool. . gatorade and brandy is an AWSOME MIX
2005-06-14 12:03:03 – GrooveMan
You need to post a Pic, I heard you can do that now πŸ˜‰
2005-06-14 12:30:17 – rand0m
CURRENT: [IMG=http://rand0m.org/images/nohairnogoat.jpg] WAS: [IMG=http://rand0m.org/images/hairandgoat.jpg] WHICH WAS FROM: [IMG=http://rand0m.org/images/nohairandgoat.jpg]
2005-06-14 12:35:37 – GrooveMan
Don’t let this happen to you :) http://slashdot.org/articles/05/06/14/1651215.shtml?tid=133
2005-06-14 15:01:39 – rand0m
Well, according the [L=http://rand0m.org/images/posttrend.jpg]Post Trend Graph & Curve[/L] I just made up, it looks like I have been a burned-out blogger for quite a while. Serious changes between September & December of 2003, with a sharp vaiation being made right at the beginning of October ’03 — right after EverLAN opened.
2005-06-14 17:00:31 – rand0m
Actual AIM conversation I just had: x 1 0 o T: uo x 1 0 o T: yo x 1 0 o T: son x 1 0 o T: wassup man rand0m: *blink blink* rand0m: do I know you? x 1 0 o T: no u dont x 1 0 o T: but i want to fuck u rand0m: ah-hah. x 1 0 o T: so can we have sex?? rand0m: not if I don’t know who you in real life. sorry :- rand0m: sounds like you’re kinda hardup, which must suck. x 1 0 o T: ok , thats fine, i will find another one rand0m: Cool. have a great life :-) WTF is *WRONG* with people? Jesus Christ.
2005-06-14 17:58:01 – realbighead
is the average college bar really any different?
2005-06-14 22:34:26 – jrdn
we have to have randal and bondage dan walk down the streets of colorado springs together… while wearing wife beaters and jeans.
2005-06-15 00:31:14 – rand0m
And we have to make sure to tuck our jeans into our 18-Eye Doc Martin’s. *sigh* Besides, you don’t want to see me in a wife beater πŸ˜‰
2005-06-15 03:04:00 – Bondage
one bald white guy = okay. . two bald white guys = nazis. looks like we aren’t hanging out any time soon :(
2005-06-15 22:14:46 – WC
Fukin nazis. hmm, you call your roomate "she" instead of "Amanda". Huh. Sup Steve-o. I haven’t seen you in a long time. Sucks EverLan got cancelled. :-( Guess I won’t be fraggin ya this summer. πŸ˜‰
2005-06-16 09:50:31 – Dave
Lookin hawt and sexahh, Randy. I myself have wondered about the shaved head look. Does male pattern baldness still show through even when you shave your head? Oh and yeah, it really really sucks about EverLAN Summer ’05 being cancelled. I’m pretty bummed about it. Especially since we were going to be the FIRST significant LAN event to feature a Battlefield 2 tournament (awesome game, by the way). *cry*
2005-06-17 22:18:29 – Netheus
Are you going to have a birthday party?
2005-06-23 21:51:14 – pinky
you’re fucking old. kisses, laura
2005-06-24 02:21:30 – The Disco Nova
Get your ass down here bitch. So we can celebrate Randallll’s brithfay in style.
2005-06-24 12:57:48 – WC
[L=http://www.wired.com/news/culture/0,1284,67970,00.html?tw=rss.TOP]Bryce Case[/L] (ytcracker) was featured on wired. I <3 my culture. Proud to be a geek!
2005-06-29 22:27:26 – sooTi-
Interesting Hair there randal…not bad, but I guess it’s interesting? LoL, I’ma go get BF2, and judging from this post, I’ma say that it’s good?…Mah b-day’s coming up to, not that anyone cares, but ya know, thought I’d throw that tidbit if info. out there. :p
2005-07-11 22:08:33 – Nell
WOw, you’re old. Much love.
2005-07-14 21:16:40 – Hellbent Rob
Early birthday wishes bro.
2005-07-15 13:03:46 – dakota
wow you shaved your head what a trip happy birthday early def cant see dan with no hair either… prolly wasnt sober. kota
2005-07-15 20:38:04 – GrooveMan
Wow… http://www.armytimes.com/story.php?f=1-292925-976420.php

worthless update

Shit, it’s almost been a month. Again. I don’t know why I update this peice of crap. More importantly, I don’t know why all the bitches keep coming back and reading my drivel. Summary ———————————– Blah blah blah work blah blah cool blah blah blah dave blah blah cool blah blah blah. Women suck. I just don’t *get* some of the things they do. How can people deny themselves a good time or an enjoyable relationship so consistently. This affects a bunch of people, so I’m not singling anybody out. I mean, I am, and you know who you are, but I’m not. Maybe it’s because I like having a good time and know how to prioritize and also don’t let my friends swing in the fucking wind, but I just don’t get how these women are so able to deprive themselves of things that they allegedly enjoy doing. And it’s not even sex or drugs or anything bad, just having a good time. Man. I just don’t *get* it. Blah blah women suck blah blah, you’ve heard it and there is no rectifying it because they are all out of they’re fucking minds, unless they are cool like Amanda. Take lessons, bitches. blah blah blah derogatory to women blah blah blah go to hell. Amanda moved in. She’s a woman, but not a woman. She’s feminine, and nice, and fun, but is still very much one of the guys. Very difficult to describe, the situation is. She’s super friendly and we get along great. And she can cook like a motherfucker. Blah blah blah, mysoginist, suck my dick you dumb fucking coozes, blah blah blah women’s lib, go die in a goddamn inferno, blah blah blah. She’s working out great. On the inside (sshhhhh, you didn’t hear it from me), I think I’m going to miss her when she moves out. No test ride, though. Blah blah blah roommate blah blah blah. That’s it. Move along. Maybe come back, I may put up some more worthless carping. I just made pictures work with like 2 minutes of coding. If I was cool, I’d make it auto-thumbnail and open in a new window, but I’m not, so I won’t. So now, a funny from my Visio stencil pack: [IMG=http://rand0m.org/images/everybodylovesclouds.gif] OH, Battlefield 2 Demo – [L=http://rand0m.org/misc/battlefield_2_demo_gc.zip]From rand0m.org[/L] [L=http://www.gamespot.com/promos/bf2demo.html]Via GameSpot[/L]

2005-06-10 01:11:31 – Master Ha-reed
If only I could watch Laura reading this…
2005-06-10 03:59:57 – dave
Thanks that was some funny shit. Needed to laugh at something besides my own smells.
2005-06-10 12:18:20 – rand0m
It’s not just for Laura, it’s for all the dumb shits that come here and then email me telling me to sod off because I’m a mysoginistic, closed-minded, woman-hating prick, which is entirely untrue — I hate everybody that is wildly emotionally unstable, directionless, considers themselves any sort of new-age "ist", and less responsible than an orangutan with a hand full of poo equally. Which basically means I hate everybody. Barring those I tolerate and the few that I actually like, of course.
2005-06-10 12:20:14 – rand0m
Oh, and don’t get me wrong, I am a lot of those things a lot of the time, and I do hate myself accordingly. So take your "omfg he’s such a hypocrite" bullshit and ram it up your ass.
2005-06-10 13:12:45 – The Disco Nova
Randallll, you should jerk off more. You have some built up tension.
2005-06-10 13:20:59 – rand0m
Ever since she moved in, I feel bad about flogging the dolphin, so my whacks:#days ratio is all wrong.
2005-06-10 22:18:15 – Netheus
Randal, you are one of the most angsty guys I know.
2005-06-10 23:47:56 – Box
/drools BF2 demo. Thanks πŸ˜€
2005-06-11 10:00:00 – rand0m
Angst, [i]A feeling of anxiety or apprehension often accompanied by depression[/i], is not something I have. Intolerance for the predictable onslaught of "you are a horrible person," yes, but anxiety? No. I used to be angsty (ask steve), but I haven’t done the depressed-because-of-what-others-think in a long time. More importantly, I haven’t done the depressed-because-of-what-[b]I[/b]-think in quite a while. Annoyance, yes, angst, no.

Month Hiatus = Huge Post

[b]Index[/b] —————— I Foreword II Introduction III Body IV Concolusion V Glossary VI Reference [b]I – Foreword[/b] ——————- I like boobies. Ta-tas if you will. This post is dedicated to them. I’d like to thank all my friends, family and acquaintances for helping me in my pursuit for neverending happiness, AKA boobies. Well, not true. Neverending happiness is more boobies + hot legs. You know what I mean. BOOBIES4TW! [b]II – Introduction[/b] ——————- It happened a long while ago that rand0m posted. We all know how vociferous and self-aggrandizing he is, and thus this work needs no introduction. -[i]Anonymous[/i] [b]III – Body[/b] —————– I feel like I’m in highschool again (1), what with all this sectioning of the post into little bite sized pieces. I don’t know if I like that at all. Thanks Steve. Punk. πŸ˜‰ I decided that I wasn’t going to post for a month about 2 weeks into my hiatus. Why? I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I wanted ya’ll to sweat a little. Maybe it’s because I am tired of running a blog. Maybe it’s because nothing wildly interesting has happened. Who knows? I can’t tell you how many people have emailed, PM’d or even asked me straight to my face whether or not I’m going to keep rand0m.org during the break. It’s a lot. I had no idea that many people care about the drivel that I put down here. I can’t fathom why they do. I implore them to not do so, because really, this site isn’t any better than the other bazillion lame-ass blogs out there. I mean, shit, if you want drivel or something, go read Slashdot’s comments (2) … they’re a lot better than rand0m.org’s (hint hint). OK Cool shit that has happened in the past month. Um … my day job hired FLDave. That’s cool, mainly because he’s really cool. He makes me want to work, which is really cool. That’s just cool. He’s cool. His car is cool. His wife is cool. His company & work is cool. He’s just cool-man-cool. I wish I was that cool. The store closed a while ago, as I posted about (3), and I have done a whole shitton of nothing in my free time. It’s been stupendous. I can work late and finish projects, I can decide to go home, I can hang out, chill out, go out with friends or not, just about anything. It’s wicked great. I can’t explain how super-awesome it is. I really do think everybody should try it out, because it really makes you appreciate having free time. James and I are considering moving a Girl (!) into the house. Scratch that, we are. If she’s amicable and all that. Goddamn, I am unsure of my ability to live in a house with a girl. Not just a girl. A young twenty-something tomboyish girl, who still has a female temperament. Note that last part. Most women friends don’t deal with my wild judgementalism, conceit & arrogance very well, but hey, if this one works out, all the better. It’s a temporary situation, though, so we’ll be looking for a roommate again come … August? Sept? Some time at the end of summer … so if you’re interested, just keep pining away and it’ll come up soon enough. I went and saw Kingdom of Heaven (4) with Steve & Ben. Before I talk about the movie, those guys are just plain cool. I’ve known Steve & Ben a long, long time, and they’re both really stand up, solid, awesome guys. So the movie. Yes, it was a decent movie, but it had Orlando Bloom in it. Now, I don’t mind him when he’s a gay elf with ears & a bow, but him trying to be this manly Knight of Doom is such a juxtaposition to how he comes off that it really throws the whole movie to pieces. I mean, Knights are these huge, death-dealing monsters hired by Kings and the like to slay the low man … not 5’8″ buck-50-wet scrawny pups like Bloom. That, combined with the ridiculous amount of inaccuracies, blatant oversights and such made the movie an enjoyable – but forgettable – Saturday night detour. I’d wait for it on DVD, $.02. Speaking of movies, we’re supposed to go see Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith on May 19th. Somehow Steve-o landed us some midnight showing tickets. I can’t wait. I hear that it’s been widely reviewed as a good movie and that it provides a strong finish to the trilogy (V2). I don’t know if I mentioned it before, but I helped Keen get a drybar. By “Get” I mean, move it out of this dude’s house in Monument, load it, drive it downtown, unload it and rebuild it in his basement. It sucked, and my back told me about it for a couple days. The drybar is really nice, though, and he got it for free, so it was worth it. I guess. I took my Alive-At-25 (5) class on … Tuesday of last week, after ditching it a saturday before that so I could get sloshed because … umm … don’t recall. OH Right, I got drunk with Joe and Ryan that turned into a smallish party. Right, so because of this party, I missed the 8am class the following morning. So I rescheduled and went and surprisingly enough it wasn’t bad. It wasn’t 4TW or anything, but it was definitely a not-bad time. I learned a few things and enjoyed myself, but most importantly I got to give the little certificate to the court, which resulted in my driving history maintaining it’s shiny spotlessness. We had another smallish party at the House (6) on Cinco de Mayo … I called James and told him to put his kicks on because I was on my way to pick him up so that we could shop. We bought a couple 12-packs of Corona, tons of beef and fixins, and went home. I started cooking, the peeps showed up and it turned into a party in short order. James didn’t like my “sketchy” friends, even though I have known them for a year+ and know that they are not sketchy. It was a really good time, and we consumed over 7lbs of beef, 2lbs of cheese, 2 bags of lettuce, 5 cans of refried beans and 20+ coronas & a decent amount of liquor. Good times. I had lunch with Sammi today so she could vent. I had a good time. Speaking of, this girl on the 11th floor I know, let’s call her Jane, wants to go to lunch sometime as well. I spoke to her today on the phone, wanted to go sometime this week, then I countered with let’s go for drinks this weekend, she hmm’d & haaaa’d, so I went with the Good Ol’ Standby Confidence approach of “call me when you want to get together (click)”. I told this story to Sammi and she did not appreciate the sheer genius … of course Jane will call back, hoping against hope that I’ll come through and take her out and not stand her up. You know why? Because I acted like I don’t need that shit. I may even ignore her for Wed-Thurs, then call her up randomly on Friday and demand lunch with her. Who knows. I’ll make sure to update and let ya’ll know what happens. Yay for lunches! [b]IV – Conclusion[/b] (aka Cliffs Notes) —————– 1. BOOBIES4TW! 2. Everybody who pines for rand0m.org should get a life … or a new blog 3. Girl moving in!? WTF!? 4. Movies rock socks 5. Speeding tickets & classes are meh 6. Parties are fun 7. So are lunches [b]V – Glossary[/b] ——————- 4TW = For The WIN! accompanied by arm-pumping … used as accolades Cool = you know, hip, with it. Honkytonkmoneyfun. You know. buck-50-wet = Might way 150lbs when soaking wet Smallish party = a 20 to 50 man party Kicks = shoes Rock Socks = are really cool, fun, etc [b]VI – Reference[/b] —————– 1 – [L=http://www.rand0m.org/viewcomments.php?NewsID=481#4916]Steve’s Request[/L] 2 – [L=http://www.slashdot.org]Slashdot.org[/L] 3 – [L=http://rand0m.org/viewcomments.php?NewsID=478]Store Closing[/L] 4 – [L=http://imdb.com/title/tt0320661/]Kingdom of Heavin[/L] 5 – [L=http://www.alive-at-25.org]Alive-At-25.org[/L] 6 – [L=http://www.weberstreet.net]Team WeberStreet[/L]

2005-05-10 22:32:03 – The Disco Nova
Randall needs to get laid. That is all, you may continue.
2005-05-11 10:05:00 – rand0m
I have two words: test ride.
2005-05-12 17:03:46 – Bondage
HomelessSluts "4TW". :)
2005-05-16 10:39:08 – WC
As your attorney I advise you to buy a red convertable.
2005-05-16 13:50:10 – GrooveMan
2007 Shelby Mustang GT500
2005-05-16 21:23:09 – WC
2007 Shelby Mustang GT500 – Red… and you have to get a fly ass bomber jacket.
2005-05-20 18:37:54 – jrdn
TEST DRIVE 4TWIIIN (arm pump)
2005-05-20 18:45:53 – The Disco Nova
Jordan 4TLOSSEEEEEE!!!!!!!!(arm pump)
2005-05-20 18:49:22 – rand0m
LOLCANO!
2005-05-21 00:43:45 – Netheus
Didn’t even crack a book this semester- 2 a’s and 2 b’s.
2005-05-26 10:06:28 – Netheus
New Gorillaz- r0xor.
2005-05-27 09:59:42 – Netheus
I just realized it’s been 9 bloody years since we met. Any of us. 9 years since VA. 9 years since govt and law. 9 years.
2005-05-27 15:58:33 – The Disco Nova
You are always welcome to drop by Christina :)
2005-05-31 16:23:05 – realbighead
good to see the once a month thing is becoming standard. it’s like randal menstruates blog posts.
2005-06-02 16:54:45 – WC
Gross. I’m sorry but I just don’t want to think about Randal menstruating anything.
2005-06-02 23:28:00 – WC
Ok I think I’m loosing it. All these thoughts going through me head. Lately I can’t relax. No matter how hard I try or Rachael tries. Like I feel like I have to know about everything, and nothing is good enough. Other times I feel like I am the only person I can trust. This is odd because I only think about that when I am alone. Weird huh? Ohh well, I’ll figure this out. Have a good day Randal (and the rest of rand0m.orgers). :-)
2005-06-03 11:58:00 – rand0m
>>Like I feel like I have to know about everything, and nothing is good enough. >>Other times I feel like I am the only person I can trust. Welcome to my world πŸ˜‰
2005-06-03 13:55:37 – The Disco Nova
Smoke less pot.
2005-06-06 10:17:11 – realbighead
Chingon, ese.
2005-06-07 12:30:26 – Master Ha-reed
Randal, its been 28 days now. Don’t tell me you got knocked up or something.
2005-06-07 16:15:57 – realbighead
randal’s preggos? that would make for an interesting 5-year reunion. assuming such a thing exists, of course.
2005-06-07 20:30:10 – pinky
a five year? I’m still too bitter for that bullshit.
2005-06-08 04:46:48 – S.Jenkins
WC… In many ways the only person you can trust is yourself. Everyone else in your life has some agenda in one way or another. The traditional saying is " I wouldn’t trust you as far as I could throw you." However, a more apt approach to this idea would be: "I wouldn’t trust you as far as you could throw me." ….just a thought. -S-
2005-06-08 16:01:56 – The Disco Nova
Who is that guy?

Redecorating, Buffy, cooking & court

OK COol thing happening as of late. I went out with Keen and got soused while playing pool last weekend. That was fun :-D. We also moved the house around quite a bit … we made our “central command” computer area, an honest-to-God dining room, and a full-blown theater/tv area with all the hottest accroutements like dolby digital everything, surround sound with a wicked woofer, 100+ inches of TV goodness, you know, total hotness. Emily & Amanda came over last night and we watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Talk about mind numbing. Holy cow that show is horrible. It’s beyond horrible. It’s so soul-stiflingly bad that I can’t describe it. And so we watched it. For like 3 1/2 hours. You can basically turn off your brain while watching it; the characters and the plots are all completely seethrough, the acting and the dialogue is awful to the max. Man. At least we had a good time heckling it. I also found out how – and how not – to make stovetop popcorn. After three batches (and a missed episode of Buffy) I finally got it down pat. I then proceeded to throw the huge bowl of popcorn on the floor, ruining that batch. So yea, four big bowls of popcorn in the trashcan later, I can now claim to be able to make stovetop popcorn. I made hashbrowns, eggs, sausage and toast for breakfast today. It was great. The hashbrowns weren’t normal ForemanGrill style hashbrowns, but real life made in a pan with butter and garlic salt yummy ones. I found that if they’re not frozen when you put them in the pan, they actually brown how one would expect them to. I have court tomorrow morning at 8:30am. I’m not looking forward to it in the slightest … I have to wake up at like 7am!! At least I get to wear a suit — I’ll definitely update with the results. [b]Update![/b] – So I went to court today in a suit, because that’s what you do when you’re trying to get off. I talked to the nice prosecutor, Catherine, put some shmooze down and had my 4-point, $145 fine/fees ticket reduced to a 0-point, $75 offense, on the provision that I take a 2hr, $25 driving class within 90 days. Wow, talk about getting off. From what I understand, it won’t even go on my record – which means that I can maintain my sparkling clean license status. Yay for working the system!

2005-04-11 08:55:26 – keener2u
How to choose your next slab of cow… http://www.ehow.com/how_109742_select-meat.html
2005-04-11 16:31:20 – Master Ha-reed
Finally, someone else who doesn’t like Buffy. I heart you Randal.
2005-04-13 16:07:00 – Hellbent Rob
How to make gourmet stove-top popcorn: 1. large pot 2. pour in just enough popcorn kernels to cover the bottom of the pot 3. use virgin olive oil and pour on top of popcorn kernels to coat entire bottom within 1/8th" (step 2 & 3 can be reversed). 4. Drop in 1/2 to 1 cup country-crock spread (or equivalent) depending on taste and calorie intake 5. 1 tablespoon Chulupa hot sauce or 1 teaspoon tabasco sauce 6. Set burner to high and gentlely shake pot until most kernels are popped, you may have to dump contents once or twice depending on the size of the pot. 7. add salt to taste (personally I don’t add any). Adding 1/4 cup of sugar instead of hot sauce gives it a carmel like coating
2005-04-15 01:33:37 – Netheus
I hate buffy too, but this leads me to a quick point. I figured out why no one likes my writing. I hate it when horrible things happen to my characters. But since that’s what drives the plot, I’m kinda screwed. That’s also why I hate buffy. Everything is okay in an hour, and what ever isn’t is contrived and superfluous. I’m damned. Oh well… I can drive the bus at least…
2005-04-16 02:12:17 – pinky
i have to get out of boulder, so i’ll prolly be in town tomorrow night if you could use some pissed off company. laura
2005-05-03 22:04:45 – Netheus
my birthday is Sunday- yes, it’s also mother’s day. GO BUY YOUR MOMMY SOMETHING NICE YOU INGRATE! and for my birthday, you should all come out to Rocky @ the Lon Chaney (same building as the City Auitorium, on the East side of the Building) $5.
2005-05-05 16:20:36 – hellbent Rob
meh… one more wretched semester down… Bump, when’s there gonna be a new post, eh? :)
2005-05-09 09:49:01 – GrooveMan
One more day and it will be one whole month… can you hold out that long Randy πŸ˜‰
2005-05-10 06:50:20 – The Disco Nova
I have it on good authority that he was waiting a month just to make you heathens cry. Personally I think it is because I cause most of the grief in Randalls life, and he can’t put it here where I can read it and remain tactful :)
2005-05-10 08:56:04 – GrooveMan
This Better be one Hell of a Post… I’m talking pages and pages, with a Glossary, Forward, Introduction, Body, Conclusion, Index, and Reference Guide. πŸ˜›

Shooting, Sin City, First steak of 2k5

OK So another update. The last update was an April FOol’s gag, minus the Pope part. He really did die. Twice.;-) Friday night rocked my socks. I went with Ryan, Joe & Jordan up to Rampart Range and burned through ~1000 rounds of ammo for an AR-15 (civilian M-16), 9mm Beretta 92fs (pistol) and 20guage shotgun. It was a helluva time. The drive up and down rampart range road (I think that’s what it’s called) was awful as my truck has zero suspension. Despite that, I had an amazing time. It was awesome. I recommend doing so to everyone :-) On Saturday night I went out with the guys and saw Sin City which was a great movie. A LOT more violent than I was expecting — no less than 5 genital mutilations, not to mention more blood and dying than I could count. The cinematography was incredible, and the dialogue was at exactly the right level of campy. Afterwards we went out to IHOP, where we had a helluva time and where I reamed out Emily for being horrible at socializing and for always having bullshit excuses to avoid going out (which is suck!). I am still determining if that was good or bad. We had steaks on Monday night. I got to light up the grill for the first time this year — much less the past 6 months — and grill up some yummy pieces of cow. That was also a hella good time. I also shaved my head tonight. Not shaved, more shorn to 3/8″. It looks like old-school me. With the still-re-growing goatee, I look pretty freakin badass, if I do say so myself. Thanks to James for trimming my neck πŸ˜‰ Last but not least, I dropped off my truck on Monday because I had sprung a gigantic exhaust leak on Sunday, even though I just had some work done a month or two ago. I took it back to the same place (Accurate Japanese Auto Repair) and they fixed it for free. Turns out that the two manifold studs they didn’t replace last time came loose, causing my truck to sound like it had a swarm of locusts under the hood. I offered to pay for the two studs, some of the labor, and for a six pack of beer and they replied with no, no and we don’t drink. Somehow I doubt that last one. Regardless, they’ve treated me well twice now, so they are now my defacto mechanic place. [b]Update[/b] – Below are the links to how the new do looks: before: [L=http://rand0m.org/images/allpics321.jpg]http://rand0m.org/images/allpics321.jpg[/L] after: [L=http://rand0m.org/images/allpics213_016.jpg]http://rand0m.org/images/allpics213_016.jpg[/L]

2005-04-06 14:45:19 – The Disco Nova
I vote before.
2005-04-06 15:30:55 – rand0m
the world disagrees with you.
2005-04-06 21:36:05 – Master Ha-reed
Actually, the world minus 1. If you do stick with this do for a while, ditch the facial hair.
2005-04-06 21:53:54 – rand0m
I’m going to let the goatee grow out a little bit (it’s only 4-5 days old) then re-evaluate it. We’ll see from there. I’m still hit or miss on the goatee in general :-/
2005-04-07 14:39:32 – Netheus
two words Randal- Ben Affleck. (minus, of course, the brown thick hair, and hot as shit gf)
2005-04-12 01:04:41 – jrdn
so… shooting rocked… randal was gangster with the beretta
2005-04-12 01:15:06 – jordan
randal got me all high on life on that last post about a miracle investor… ojhghseghsegohsdljg;hsf
2005-04-13 12:19:31 – Ryan
I know you didn’t mention it in this posting, but please, even though they aren’t bad, do NOT buy a Glock.
2005-04-14 02:14:48 – BoxOfLunch
I just bought a glock after reading your post Ryan. πŸ˜‰
2005-04-14 13:22:27 – Master Ha-reed
What’s the problem with a Glock?

Super Duper Good news, and Super Duper Bad News

Super duper good news is that we are not closing EGC. Turns out we got a miracle investor who is going to fund the whole shebang well into next year, with very few strings attached. I’m totally stoked. Yea, the free time thing is toast again, but at least my baby will live on! Super Duper Bad News. I rolled into the dayjob tonight on a lark and found the place totally vandalized … a couple of our glass windows are cracked, and one is totally broken. It doesn’t look like they took any customer gear at all, but they did empty out our storage locker and pillaged my office. They even took my mouse, so I’m using a clunker peice of shit to post this. They tried to take the 21″ monitor, but couldn’t so they left it overturned on the desk :-/ The critical part is that nothing is damaged beyond repair and nobody went down. In-fucking-credible. At the end of the week too. Bastards. Sometimes I feel like life is just one great big beat down followed by a short rise, followed by another great big beat down. Wash, rince, repeat. I mean, the good times are fun and all, but they’re totally squashed by the unending heap of crap that is laid down. It’s just one thing after another. One second I’m reveling in the fact that I can stay home and drink beer all day, and the next I’m feeling horribly guilty because other people don’t have it as good as me. As they say — without the lows, you never really get to relish the highs. [b]update[/b] – I forgot to mention that I did a DNS server shuffle for rand0m.org, so ya’ll shouldn’t experience any more randomly-unavailable rand0m.org. [b]update2[/b] – I just heard that Pope John Paul II has died. Mitch Hedberg, Terry Schiavol The Pope, Johnny Cochrane and KILO’s Sam. Goddamn it’s been a bad week. [b]update3[/b] – WOW Seattle has banned free WiFi due to them causing a fire at a coffee shop: [L=http://db.tidbits.com/getbits.acgi?tbart=08041]Seattle Bans Free Wi-Fi[/L]

2005-04-01 12:12:46 – w0lfy
I heard he’s not dead yet, has brain and heart function. Somebody forgot to tell FoxNews that easter was last weekend — he can’t come back to life now, he’s a week late!
2005-04-01 12:15:29 – rand0m
What’s sad is that I think people will want to watch more reruns of Schiavo drooling and blinking rather than a clip of the Pope waving. These are great times. *sigh*
2005-04-04 10:44:07 – mark
Wait. That WiFi article was dated April 1st. I am having a tough time believing a coffee machine exploded due to "WiFi radiation" as the article states.
2005-04-04 11:40:22 – The Disco Nova
Oh, and strangely enough, it was posted on april fools day.
2005-04-04 12:15:49 – rand0m
Yea, mark actually PM’d me to make sure that was fake. This April Fool’s didn’t go over as well as [L=http://rand0m.org/viewcomments.php?NewsID=430]last year’s[/L].
2005-04-04 14:01:06 – mark
I am, in fact, pretty worthless. and slow.
2005-04-04 15:21:32 – The Disco Nova
That was a trully great flamefest, complete with pwnage.
2005-04-04 23:04:46 – Netheus
so…. no monitor that I will actually be able to read? :::pouts:::: yeah, this year seems pretty deadly so far. Finished moving, still moving in. My god we own a lot of crap. And I mean crap. I knew I was a pack rat, but this is farking ridiculous. And my neighbors up stairs are amazingly ignorant. A) Shrimp Cocktail is served cold. Cold does not = raw. Blue/black/ grey = raw, pink= cooked. If one overcooks shrimp, it’s tough and inedible. B) They are the Ute Indians (YOU-teh), not the oooh-tay Indians. And I seriously didn’t think that computer illiteracy of that level could operate a mouse. And car oil needs to be changed, not just refilled. And you shouldn’t drive around with the parking brake on, all you have to do is pull slightly and twist, not a big operational issue there. And if you expect to get a decent working car for only $1K, I have some nice swamp land in Florida that’s worth millions…. People’s ignorance – still amazes the fuck out of me that there are sooo many people still walking on the planet….