Laundry, Flat Tire, Outing, Tax Dilemma

Okay, so I went to the Laundromat again on Sunday night. Not my normal laundromat, which is down the street, but over on the westside as it was late sunday night and I needed a 24 hour one. This trip wasn’t as crazy as it normally is. Well, actually, it was more “crazy” but less exciting. I got there right around 10:40pm and immediately noticed that their washers are newer than my normal laundromat’s, but it costs the same. I think. Honestly, I don’t even notice, I just keep plugging in the quarters until I think it’s ready to go. Regardless, at right around 11pm, ~10 minutes into my wash cycle, three people come in with a truckload of laundry. And by truckload, I mean [i]a truckload[/i], the back of a datsun pickup filled with laundry, covered with a tarp. Not the highest class gang I’ve ever met. Among them was a guy who was crazy as a loon who kept on going on about how “his people”, referring to his own indian heritage?, called the Sioux indians “Prairie Niggers”. He found this quite amusing, and regalled us with the same tale 8-9 times in an hour. Fascinating. The other people, however, were quite normal and were pleasurable company. The time came, and I left with all my laundry – a slow laundry run, coming in at 1h 39m. I woke up and got ready to go to work on Sunday morning and came out to a flat tire on the front-left of my truck. I was unhappy, and walked the requisite 2 blocks to work. Later that evening, James helped me put my spare on so I could go do laundry and such. I got the flat tire fixed for $8, from their normal $16, over at Tire King, just west of Academy on Galley. Good group of guys over there, very fast service, and said they’d cut a deal on my next set of tires. Cool beans. I’ll need to put the real tire back on in place of the spare sometime this week. I went out with [L=]Laura[/L] on Saturday night, as she was in town and (I presume) had nothing better to do. We went over to Phantom Canyon and got to enjoy a total solace downstairs – didn’t see any other customers while we were there. I had a good time, especially because Laura is much more fluent and literate than I when it comes to conversing about variably complex topics, ranging from beer to politics to affirmative action. It was nice to have a sit down with her. She isn’t as loony 1-on-1 as she is in a group, and I found myself agreeing with her liberal views on several topics. It really was a breath of fresh air – thanks Laura :-). I have a tax quandry. I made some bucks (untaxed) on some contract work and have to pay the taxes on it real soon now. Depending on how I file that income with the IRS, it will cost me either $820 or $418, alongside a $386 refund ($434 or $32, out of pocket). This is quite the ethical dilemma, and is running the risk of an audit? What the hell is there to audit, here’s my W2 & my 1099, what do I owe now? The difference? I am thinking that it is worth it to intentionally misfile, save the $400 right now then run the slight risk of getting flagged and asked to refile. Oh, the $402 tax difference is FICA/Medicaid/Social Security. Isn’t it great that over 35% of my income goes to Federal taxes? And that I can get 50% of that money back by *not* paying for F/M/SS, which are things I will never use in my lifetime? Incredible. I talked to Sammi the other day, and she, despite being hundreds of miles away, is still incredible. Even three or four sentences from her, over a terribly impersonal medium like the intarweb, totally makes my day. Also amazing. [b]Update[/b]: I totally forgot to mention that there is now a Photos link up at the top that goes to the galleries I’ve collected. Also, the database has been cleaned up considerably, so the site should feel a lot faster.

2004-02-10 18:26:43 – Jared Seehafer
I really wouldn’t worry about not seeing anything from Social Security. The govt will do anything it can before it starts wiping out social security, because old people are cranky and they vote more than us youngins.
2004-02-11 15:44:32 – Hellbent Rob
Randal, I saw that Matt K. has been posting last month. Damn surprised that he’d look any of us up, or that he would even give a shit. Oh well, I figure we’ve all escaped the assylum with a decade to clear our heads. Anyhow, I hope that he is well and that he’ll be able to restart his business. Never thought I’d hear from him again. If its okay, I’d like to try to keep in touch through your website, but truthfully, I’m not ready to make personal contact with him yet. Hell man, I swore I wouldn’t come back to the Springs until my 10th high school reunion, and so far I’m keeping that promise. My kid Cameron is turning 2 on friday 2/13/04; give me a call, I’ll be home all day.
2004-02-11 16:32:02 – rand0m
jesus it’s like a freakin family reunion in here! *plots about buying to clear off*
2004-02-11 22:36:44 – Hellbent Rob
my sentiment exactly, so don’t get all sappy on me. Occassionally, I miss our little F***ed-up herd. I hope that the holy rollers don’t give you too much grief. I’m always still surprised that you didn’t run for the hill like the rest of us little inmates.
2004-02-12 08:35:08 – Netheus
I am getting an $1100 tax refund. Thing is, I only paid in like $450. It’s the I am poor and going to college tax refund. It’s so great.
2004-02-12 17:15:03 – WC
GOD DAMN it dude. I bet you never thought you’d be able to have all your family just start posting away on your site. LOL. Hooray for google.
2004-02-12 21:51:31 – JoeY
cool stuff, yay for laundry stories!!!
2004-02-17 14:32:30 – Matt K.
Dear rando, what’s up! Bit of advice about taxes. If you do things for money as a private contractor you can lie to the government all you want. It’s your word against theirs. You give them the poor mouth and hide your earnings in the other pocket. Just don’t be stupid and put any of it in a bank where they can monitor it. Simply put, if the party you worked for didn’t report those earnings to the govement, then they didn’t actualy happen. Remember the old saying, documentation is everything. If it ain’t documented, it didn’t happen. Besides the I.R.S. is a downsized toothless lion now and won’t go after you unless you really poke them with a stick. They have less pesonel and resources to simply do the same negligent job they alswys did. And if somehow you manage to get targeted out of the other millions of more atractive targets available you simply file for a hearing, push it off several years, refile several times and take advantage of the same beurocratic slowness that they use. If you ever manage to get held liable for lost funds you simply have a tax counciler go and refile again for pennies on the dollar settlement and arange for a payment plan. By then your 85 years old and it don’t matter anyways. Hey Robert! What the, how the heck are you!!!!!! Damn good to hear from you. I have really missed you. Hey sorry about life as we grew up. I make bad choices like everybody else. Glad to see that other people thought that our youth was rather…..odd. Guess we all just got out of dodge any way we could. Life is good now and I’m real glad to hear that you are doing well. Sometimes it’s a struggle to just figure out what direction to go in, but once you get yourself pointed in the right direction and work hard everything works out. Real happy to hear from you. Thought that I had lost you and rando. Heck even Marla was kind of nice to see as an adult. (not nearly as pychotic). So I would realy like to get to know you guys again as adults without the "mom" effect. Remember as always, "Don’t eat the big green mint in the urinal. It’s not good for you." P.S. I have discovered another property of aged choc-o-malt-o-meal. If properly aged to the right consistancy this matterial has extrordinary elastic properties. So much so that it can be used as a subtitute for possible silicone implants?? I have also found that after long periods of exposure to high dose electromagnetic radiation it still makes a pretty good ashtray. With prolonged treatment I wonder if it will make a suitable rubber door stop. So long from the land of the gentle (and mental.) Matt K.
2004-02-17 16:22:01 – WC
ok, hypothecally. Do drug dealers think about paying taxes? I sure wouldn’t if I was a dealer. Cuz think about it. We pay income taxes because our government helps (or tries) to ensure our economy has jobs for its citizens; us. But since the government is very much against illicit drug use, I’d think that legally the government couldn’t legally tax a dealer since the government doesn’t try to ensure a market for the dealer. Which brings me to my next question. Would you consider a drug dealer a ‘private distributor’, ‘personal chemical therapist’, or something else. Ideas?
2004-02-17 17:03:54 – Netheus
how about unlicensed pharmacist?
2004-02-19 19:12:51 – JoeY
notice, randal’s post is exactly 420 pm lol
2004-02-19 23:04:45 – Netheus
Today was beautiful. The thick grey clouds just hung on all day, and the fluffy white ones just kept rolling in and out all day, and right before sunset there were little white ones that were just hanging in the foot hills, resting in the valleys. The rain made the smoke on the trees turn black, and mountains just seemed bluer than usual. I love days like today.
2004-02-21 23:56:57 – WC
yah, ph3ar. And I say if we should have system in place to keep out of state (aliens) in their own stupid state. I’m gready for Colorado. Hehe.
2004-02-26 10:35:15 – Hellbent Rob
WC, Yes the federal government does tax drug dealers. It requires illicit drug dealers to purchase a special stamp/label for each gram of the illicit substance, hence it is a form of sales tax/licensing fee/user surcharge. Remember, the Feds didn’t nail Al Capone on racketeer, that charge was made statutory years later, he was caught evading taxes. Income tax does not just go to the economy for providing jobs. A huge portion of your tax dollar actually goes to servicing the national debt, which as we know is the interest on bonds and securities it sells to banks and brokers. This however, does influence the economy in the form of monetary policy, or the availability of loanable funds. Fiscal policy is the Government ability to influence the economy through taxing and spending, but isn’t used as often or as forcefully as monetary policy. What the Feds really blow your money on after servicing the debt is on defense, social security, medicare and medicaid, and intergovernmental fund transfers. As far as the IRS having no teeth, well it has been severely curtailed during the Clinton Administration when he downsized the federal government. You can file for a hearing with several appeal opportunities, but it isn’t as indefinite as previously mentioned. The IRS administrative hearing is an alternative to the judicial remedy of the normal courts and the process usually only takes one to two years before the IRS punts it back to the federal courts or decides to set up some kind of payment schedule at reduced rates. But it is not unusual for some cases to take much longer before it passes the buck. However, there are certain things that statutorily it can not reduce repayment on such as student loans, back child support, etc. The best way to get flagged for tax evasion is to be a contractor. The IRS has industry actuary statements on how much types of contractors make in your area, and if it looks funny they may investigate, but it is unlikely, unless you’re making a killing under the table. Also remember that tax evasion is both a criminal and civil charge which means that they may not nail you on the criminal charge, but may nail you on the civil side because it doesn’t have to prove its cause beyond a reasonable doubt.
2004-03-08 10:42:53 – Matt K.
Yeah but remember the law of the wild, if you blend in with the rest of the herd when they flock it tends to stump preditors like the I.R.S. into nonaction. They tend to hunt units of a flock that differentate themselves from the rest in some manor. Dr. flemming found that by painting a red stripe on a zebra that it was the same thing as signing it’s death warrent on the plains of africa. As the commecial goes what can a red painted zebra tell us about mutual funds. Nothing, but the point is the I.R.S. has a real hard time picking out one zebra from a herd of a few thousand. Safety in numbers. Just don’t stick your head up. Plus rule number 2#) As a contractor, you are your own boss and being the boss means making winning decisions. Telling the I.R.S. that you are a contractor is not a winning decision. In fact telling the Gov. any information is not a winning decision. The rule says silence is golden because you can only operate on the info at hand. Rule 3#)Safety is when nobody knows what you are doing. Security is when they don’t even suspect that your acting covertly. As one of my anti-gov. / crazy nam’ friends calls it "Stay off the mike and fly stealth." And like I say, "All problems can be solved with high explosives." EXAMPLE: The Federal building bombing. Primarilly this is an example of when a half dozen or so, zebras have taken enough shit and then kick the bejeesus out of the lion. I say more kicking.